August 20

Retreat — It’s good that there was time for meditating on the Word, and that God spoke to everyone. I wonder how long such a message will stick with them. I am thankful that there was still space for everyone to come together, in person and to share online. I am thankful for the commitment and the heart that these leaders have, and I should not discourage them from finding their own place to serve the church, in whatever capacity. However, I am sensing a lack of focus and direction from a few individuals, which worries me. Just like how it worries me when I consider how much damage I can do in the course of a few years, the impact that each person has seems to be out sized and disproportionate to the person. Only God can redeem and save us from the errors of our ways.

God has indeed been gracious to our ministry, keeping some individuals invested. How do I keep sowing into them? What do I do with those who seem to evade care?

I’m thankful to have Sarah to talk to, and that she is able to articulate the thoughts that are even just beginning to form in my mind. Perhaps she is a godsend in that sense. Thinking about how we place so much value on getting attached, how we say we celebrate achievements but seem to hold weddings in much higher regard. Even though I countered and said this might be the joy we feel because it is an answered prayer for many involved, perhaps then this begs the question of why this is the only (or few) things that we fervently pray about, but not about other things like the state of the global church. Are we too myopic? Is this rooted in the fundamental need for us to not be alone?

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